Return Policy

ALL SALES ARE FINAL.  NO RETURNS.

Initially, we allowed returns years ago, but due to extensive abuse, we implemented a no-returns policy. Examples of this abuse included:

  • Customers were returning used products after refilling the bottles with other mysterious liquids.
  • Customers would buy new product and return expired products they had sourced elsewhere.
  • There have been instances where customers returned counterfeit products in place of the original items they purchased. For example, with Quick Fix, the packaging must be opened to verify authenticity, but once it’s opened, the product becomes unsellable due to the packaging be torn open to verify the product.
  • Items like whizzinators or monkey dongs were returned after use, despite claims from the customers it was never open and unused.
  • Customers buying a new whizzinator or monkey dong and sending back old ones they had from years ago in it’s place, but inspection shows it was an older model, has seen years of use and had to be disposed of or shipped back to the person.

This “No Return” policy helps protect our customers by ensuring that used or counterfeit products do not re-enter our inventory, preventing potential issues for unsuspecting buyers.